Transportation Woes

Retrieved from: guyanachronicle.com

Stemming from the extra long weekend we had, I feel the need to comment on my travelling experiences for the past 4 days. I'm sure that anyone would naturally prefer having private, personal transportation on a daily basis. Some of us are blessed enough to have a car all to ourselves, however some of us aren't as lucky. For the rest of us, we're stuck sharing vehicular transport with other humans. Not just any type of humans. No Sir! We are forced to travel everyday with the most obnoxious and inconsiderate humans ever! 

Now let me break it down for you. I dream of travelling on American buses. I really do. Why? Because I've spent my whole lifespan having to experience minibuses. For those of you who don't know what a minibus is or looks like, it's a bus so small that only mini sized people can comfortably sit inside of it. Yea that's right, they were made for little people. So in Guyana, we have the pleasure of  being jammed up against some random person's leg on the way to work  in the mornings.

Here's a list of all the types of annoying people and things you'll encounter on a minibus:

• 
• The Conductors: I truly believe that conductors are the true visionaries and miracle workers of this world. You know why? Cuz they see space in the bus that no one else can. Just when you thought you couldn't be more uncomfortable, they find a way to prove you wrong.  Big up yuhselves conductors! Where there is no way you make a way...but not really. (Picture shows 39 passengers, including the driver, inside a 15 seat minibus...looks comfortable)
• The Drivers: Now I understand that you need to make money. I understand that "time is money". But why is it that if you're in such a hurry, you still have time to try to pick up every thing that moves on the side of the road. People be hardly outside their door and you bus drivers stopping to pick them up.
• "Fat People": I have nothing against fat people. However, I have something against fat people that know they cannot fit yet they force their body masses upon the other passengers. I also have a problem with skinny people believing that they are fat and need to take up extra space. Why y'all gotta be so rude? Don't you know I need space too? 
• Sweaty People: Sweating is a part of life. We all have to deal with it. BUT I cannot deal with your sweat on my clothes and skin. No. Don't touch me mortal! 
• Overly Friendly People: *Sighs* Now this could be rudeness but it's just me. When I'm on the bus I don't want to strike up long meaningless conversations with you random person. Leave me alone so I can stare eerily out the window in peace.
• Unnecessary Touchers: These people are similar to fat people. Only thing is they seem to think that your pheromones smell like chocolate and sunshine. They sit so close to you they leave no space for The Spirit between the two of you. When you can hear that person's breathing...they too close. 
• Loud, Distasteful Music: Some people like listening to Vybz and Alkaline at eardrum shattering volumes at 8 am. However, the majority of the general population would agree with me when I say that I don't want to spend 20-45 minutes listening to the descriptions of female unmentionables in agonizing detail. 

Based on the list I just wrote I'm sure you can tell that I get really aggressive toward other people in buses or any other type of transportation for that matter. But I'm sure that someone out there must agree with me on some of these. 

Third World Black Girl

Living In A Generally Unwanted, Unknown Counrty

Retrieved on: pinterest.com

Okay, i'll just put it out there now and say that I live in Guyana, South America. Not Ghana, as in the country located on the continent of Africa, like it's usually pronounced by our Northern counterparts. Yes Guyana, the piece of land shaped like a lady with wide hips between Suriname and Venezuela. Yea that one.  

Now there are many problems that we Guyanese face just as a result of living here. Going with my normal flow of limiting my list to the bare minimum, here are the three main problems Guyana faces which we have absolutely no control over.

1. We are generally disliked by our neighbors: Yes I said it kids. I just released the mother load. Believe it or not the rest of the Caribbean doesn't even like us. They basically tolerate us cuz we happened to be one of the first countries to sign the Treaty of Chaguaramas in CARICOM (feel free to google this stuff if you feel lost).  They don't even consider us to be part of the Caribbean. Reason being, we're not an island... Uhhh, Belize isn't an island. Why y'all be hatin'? We aren't even accepted by South America since we're the only English speaking country and also the poorest. How ya like that? We're basically the red headed step child that no one wants to be a part of the family but you still keep them cuz you don't want to look bad in front of social services. 


2. We are generally unknown: People always found it kinda weird that Guyana is snugly nestled between two well known countries (especially a country like Venezuela) and people still have never heard of it. However, I believe that i have unlocked the answer within the depths of my mind. You wanna know why? It's because of Jamaica. As soon as you mention that Guyana is part of the Caribbean the response you get is, " Oh! The Caribbean! Like Jamaica! Wat ah gwan mon?"  Okay first of all, the entire Caribbean doesn't have a Jamaican accent. Second, Jamaica isn't the Caribbean. Gee thanks Jamaica for creating such high tourism goals for the rest of us. Let's blame Jamaica!


3. We're known for the worst things ever: When we do get attention, it's from BBC or some other news company reminding the world of where the Jonestown Massacre happened. Yes, it happened here. We remember. We hardly even sell Koolaid in our supermarkets anymore. Even if we do no one buys it due to the fact that we're never allowed to forget. It's like communion only thing you're sipping on cherry Koolaid and you instantly think of Jim Jones instead of Jesus. Seriously though, we don't drink Koolaid... this is a Mak C country. 

Things get better at the end of the day since you'd find that most of the Guyanese population doesn't even care what the rest of the world thinks about us. They're actually pretty oblivious in most cases. I guess our motto should be changed from One People, One Nation, One Destiny to something like  Just Roll With The Punches since it's something we actually do.

Third World Black Girl

The Natural Hair Struggles

Retrieved from: blackhair.about.com

So since the emergence of "No More Creamy Crack", more commonly known as the Natural Hair Movement, a lot of women across the globe have signed on to the whole shin dig. A lot of us current Naturalistas originally thought that this transition back to the original textures of our hair would be fun and easy. Besides how hard could it be to regrow  and manage your natural hair? Oh you really wanna know? Let me tell you just how real the struggle is living with natural hair.

1. Would you grow already?!: Every one starts off on this journey full of hope for the future, daydreaming of the long curly mane they'll be sporting. Surfing Youtube day and night trying to absorb as much info as you can. On the other hand, no one thinks of the fact that your hair takes literally FOREVER to actually grow. Honestly sometimes it feels like your hair follicles hate you. Then you watch all those American girls on Youtube saying they've been growing their hair for the same amount of time and you'd think they were the far removed cousins of Rapunzel. 
2.  Oh mister sun, sun, mister golden sun: The sun can be your worst enemy when you're living in a hot tropical climate. You leave the house with your twist out on a fleekage level of HOT DANG and then during the ten minutes you take to walk to the bus stop  your hair's looking something like a dried out old sponge. No amount of hair mayonnaise can save you now. It's gone....it's just...gone.
3. We cool and everything, but don't touch: It seems that on your best hair day, when you took the effort to painstakingly place every single curl in the correct spot, that people be putting their unwashed hands up in your hair. I can tell you now that every single natural haired girl has considered either decapitating or punching those people in the face every single time. Not today Satan! Keep your hands to yourself until I give you permission to touch the merchandise (which may actually be never). 
4.  Why are you so high maintenance??!! WHY?!: Whenever you see a girl on the street with her natural hair looking like a pile of awesomeness on top her head, let her know it. Why? Cuz you don't know the struggle that is the process of actually making you hair look presentable for the next day. The time that it takes to wash, de-tangle, spin, twist, plait, comb through, moisturize and still get enough sleep to not look a pile of hot mess in the morning is serious. Naturalistas honestly make magic happen every morning (that is when we don't have weave in our hair lol).

The problems that I mentioned are not only faced by 'third worlders' but pretty much every woman that's going natural on the globe. Some have it worse than others but we're still all in the struggle together. I chose to limit myself to four points but believe me... the list can go on. And on. And on....

Don't get me wrong, I have thoroughly enjoyed my natural hair journey. Both the days of "I'm one fine mama jama" and the days of "Gimme a scissors, I can't take this anymore". But eventually you just learn to take it all in stride and roll with the breakage. 

Third World Black Girl

Let's Start With Some Introductions...

I think that people usually start their blogs off by giving a full bio with their names and hobbies and stuff but yea let's just skip all that. Besides I think that might actually be in my information box...if there is one. Nonetheless, what you should know is that I'm a black girl living in a "third world" country and this blog is going to express the rantings and ravings, opinions and random thoughts of a total lunatic (which just so happens to be me BTW). 

So many people have asked me, "Why Third World Black Girl?" Well it's actually quite simple. That title pretty much sums up who I am and what I'm gonna talking about. Life in a small developing country deemed to be the third poorest country in the western hemisphere can be less than thrilling sometimes. To add to that there are a whole bunch of other issues that come with being a black girl living in a small developing country deemed to be the third poorest country in the western hemisphere. There are the struggles getting a job with an acceptable pay slip to compliment all those degrees you have (and trust me the struggle is indeed all too real), no access to Proactive products which you really need (when you do find them, you'll have to sell your ovaries just to get the cleanser) and let's not forget that your country doesn't have a McDonald's, but let's not even get started on that. 

I know that by the end of this post many of you will be punching into your Google search bars "Third poorest Country in the Western Hemisphere". But I'll just let you do it and call it homework instead of giving you all the answers. That is unless it is also in my information box... I don't even know if people will actually be reading this which gives me quite a bit of confidence to say whatever I want. In the case someone actually reads this then I should give you two little pieces of advice before you consider revisiting to read future posts: 

 Numero UNO... This blog isn't for you if you cannot handle endless amounts of sarcasm and corny jokes. I believe myself to be quite funny. Don't hate... Appreciate. 

 And B... I really don't have any defined train of thought. Neither do I commit myself to a sequential or organized system of operations. As a result, this blog will be a "whenever i have the time or another idea of what to write about or whenever I remember that I have a blog" blog. Content may be a bit sporadic but I'll try my best to actually write about things of consequence.

So officially, Welcome to into the grand canyon crevices of the mind of a...

Third World Black Girl.