Transportation Woes

Retrieved from: guyanachronicle.com

Stemming from the extra long weekend we had, I feel the need to comment on my travelling experiences for the past 4 days. I'm sure that anyone would naturally prefer having private, personal transportation on a daily basis. Some of us are blessed enough to have a car all to ourselves, however some of us aren't as lucky. For the rest of us, we're stuck sharing vehicular transport with other humans. Not just any type of humans. No Sir! We are forced to travel everyday with the most obnoxious and inconsiderate humans ever! 

Now let me break it down for you. I dream of travelling on American buses. I really do. Why? Because I've spent my whole lifespan having to experience minibuses. For those of you who don't know what a minibus is or looks like, it's a bus so small that only mini sized people can comfortably sit inside of it. Yea that's right, they were made for little people. So in Guyana, we have the pleasure of  being jammed up against some random person's leg on the way to work  in the mornings.

Here's a list of all the types of annoying people and things you'll encounter on a minibus:

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• The Conductors: I truly believe that conductors are the true visionaries and miracle workers of this world. You know why? Cuz they see space in the bus that no one else can. Just when you thought you couldn't be more uncomfortable, they find a way to prove you wrong.  Big up yuhselves conductors! Where there is no way you make a way...but not really. (Picture shows 39 passengers, including the driver, inside a 15 seat minibus...looks comfortable)
• The Drivers: Now I understand that you need to make money. I understand that "time is money". But why is it that if you're in such a hurry, you still have time to try to pick up every thing that moves on the side of the road. People be hardly outside their door and you bus drivers stopping to pick them up.
• "Fat People": I have nothing against fat people. However, I have something against fat people that know they cannot fit yet they force their body masses upon the other passengers. I also have a problem with skinny people believing that they are fat and need to take up extra space. Why y'all gotta be so rude? Don't you know I need space too? 
• Sweaty People: Sweating is a part of life. We all have to deal with it. BUT I cannot deal with your sweat on my clothes and skin. No. Don't touch me mortal! 
• Overly Friendly People: *Sighs* Now this could be rudeness but it's just me. When I'm on the bus I don't want to strike up long meaningless conversations with you random person. Leave me alone so I can stare eerily out the window in peace.
• Unnecessary Touchers: These people are similar to fat people. Only thing is they seem to think that your pheromones smell like chocolate and sunshine. They sit so close to you they leave no space for The Spirit between the two of you. When you can hear that person's breathing...they too close. 
• Loud, Distasteful Music: Some people like listening to Vybz and Alkaline at eardrum shattering volumes at 8 am. However, the majority of the general population would agree with me when I say that I don't want to spend 20-45 minutes listening to the descriptions of female unmentionables in agonizing detail. 

Based on the list I just wrote I'm sure you can tell that I get really aggressive toward other people in buses or any other type of transportation for that matter. But I'm sure that someone out there must agree with me on some of these. 

Third World Black Girl